According to the research, “when the average, non-military American thinks about the United States’ conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, he or she generally associates the stressors and casualties of the wars with the active-duty services members.”

Contrary to these findings, the spouses typically endure comparable amounts of stress, but their health care needs are often obscured by a primary concern for the soldier. Fortunately, reliance on self-care and spousal support can offer a viable means to cope.

Taking up a hobby, such as yoga, is just one way to recharge.

Do Something For Yourself

“Many of us worry about putting ourselves first. We worry we’re being selfish or we’re not living up to our duties as a spouse,” Deployment Diva blogger Jessica Aycock writes. “In life, there has to be a balance of give and take. Think about the last time you did something for yourself.”

Spouselink.org, a website dedicated to connecting military spouses through “supportive, informative, and inspiring” articles, cites self-care as a basic need to efficiently manage the stress. Even taking a few minutes a day to relax can be beneficial. Starting a hobby, such as yoga, taking a nap, or taking a walk can also provide an outlet to recharge, supplying the energy necessary to handle the highs and lows of the military life.

Proactive, Not Reactive

Another way to reduce stress is to learn how to be proactive rather than reactive. If the same cycle of challenges are the cause of frustration, it may be possible to mentally prepare in advance. First, take a look at expectations – are they realistic? Second, accept what cannot be changed. Especially in repetitive situations, these preventative measures can drastically reduce stress by knowing what to expect.

Finding a “Battle Buddy” can perhaps be the greatest savior of spousal sanity during a significant other’s deployment. Connecting with fellow military spouses is easier than ever, with countless online groups and blogs dedicated to supporting one another. Military.com, an online organization that even offers a “Buddy Finder” feature, praises military spouse friends for their ability to understand and relate without judgement.

“Bottom line: They just get it. There is no explaining things in detail, there is no need to have to call out for help; MilSpouses just know, they understand, they empathize, and they will listen and try to help without being asked.”

Stick With Other Military Spouses

Various readers rang in on the importance of befriending other military spouses, with reasons of reliable and unconditional support, valuable mentor insight, and even comic relief. While military life isn’t exactly funny, sometimes a good laugh can be a hearty reminder not to take everything so seriously.

Army spouse Kay Wise writes about the MilSpouses that embody each of these qualities. The “Hooah” spouse is reliable; this is the person that will be willing to help in whatever way possible at any given time. The “Seasoned” spouse is experienced and knowledgeable, always ready to give advice. Got a question? If this spouse doesn’t know the answer, he or she will know someone who does. The “Friend” spouse is perhaps the closest – one to trust and call for a shoulder to cry on.

Not only is there no better reason to take the time for some self-appreciation, there’s no one more deserving.

Photo courtesy Tomas Sobek

It’s been a few months since you swore by your New Year’s resolution, and chances are you’ve already stumbled and slipped a few times along the way. In fact, a 2007 study showed out of 3,000 people who made a New Year’s resolution, 88 percent failed, even though over half were confident of success originally.

So what to do? Could you possibly recover from a New Year’s resolution slip? The answer is yes. Here are 4 easy tips to help you stay on track.

It’s important to remember to reinvigorate yourself.

Slip, don’t fall

The simple truth is that slip-ups are common. Unless you are a master of discipline, in which case a resolution probably wouldn’t have been necessary, expect setbacks. Don’t get discouraged just because you skipped gym this week or splurged on something outside of your budget. Change is a process, and these backslides should be recognized as a part—not the end—of that process.

Let the slip-ups serve as reminders for you to get back on the wagon.

Re-motivate yourself

It could take up to 254 days to form a habit. So, most likely, you will need to give yourself a little push several times during those eight-odd months. Think about what your motivators were at the beginning and re-commit to them. Write down those motivations and refer back to the list when you feel like slipping.

Fix your mistakes and reward your progress

We learn best from our mistakes. Say your resolution was to stay out of debt this year, and you find a late fee on your credit card bill. Instead of throwing in the towel and calling it quits, accept the mistake, look at what led up to it and try not to put yourself in that position next time. For example, if it’s forgetfulness that led to the late fees, set up automatic payments to take care of the bill.

Every step you take towards your resolution should be celebrated. Make a milestone checklist that breaks down the resolution into doable, realistic chunks. Then decide on a reward for each milestone just as extra encouragement.

Build a support system

Finding a resolution-buddy is probably the most efficient way for you to keep your resolve. Family and friends are great people to share your experiences–including progress and setbacks–with. You may also consider joining a support group or connecting with someone who is trying to achieve or has achieved the same goals.

Photo courtesy Flotographic Arts

Washing machines can be hidden dangers to children.

When parents think of household dangers to children, most would probably cite coffee spills, hot stoves, sharp objects and bathtubs as examples of things that commonly cause harm to children. But what about the rest of the house? It might come as a surprise that certain objects such as washing machines and televisions can pose a risk to kids.

In order to keep your home as safe as possible for your children, here are a few hidden household dangers to look out for.

Loose Cords

Cords dangling from window shades do not immediately seem like a threat to a child’s safety. But a young child who starts playing with a cord can accidentally get caught in it, leading to injury or worse. According to CNN.com, parents should tie up loose cords that hang low to the ground from blinds so a child won’t be able to reach it. Also avoid placing furniture that children can climb on in front of a window.

The same goes for bungee or power cords. Aside from tripping a child, power cords can cause electrical burns, according to CNN.com. Put power cords away whenever possible, and if they must stay out, try to not leave them out in the open.

Changing Light Bulbs and Batteries

Light bulbs can be dangerous in their own right, due to heat, breakage or chemicals. And if you change a light bulb while your child watches below, this can cause even more damage than a light bulb simply breaking. Because changing a light bulb is a tricky and delicate process, make sure your child is not watching underneath. Glass could shatter or chemicals could get into eyes, so make sure your children are a safe distance away, according to Global Children’s Fund. This applies to batteries as well because corrosive acid could fall into a child’s eyes on accident.

Washing Machines

Finally, washing machines can be a danger to children, especially if the machine is top-loading, according to MSN. If there is water in the machine, a small child could become submerged and perhaps burned in hot water. A spinning basin could also pose danger to a child. Be sure not to leave your children unattended in the laundry room, and don’t leave a way for them to climb on the washing machine in case they get into the room.

Although many more household dangers exist, these are ones that might not come to mind so quickly. Taking precaution will greatly lower the chances of such a disaster occurring.

Photo courtesy of jim212jim

It’s easy to get lost between taking care of your loved one, the kids and yourself. You grow tired and feel overwhelmed. When 24 hours just doesn’t seem enough, try these time management strategies to take control of the home front.

The Pomodoro Technique

A Pomodoro timer could be your secret to productivity.

“Pomodoro,” the Italian word for tomato, is best known in culinary circles. But the Pomodoro Technique is great for everyone — and can help you work more productively.

The Pomodoro Technique involves a tomato-shaped kitchen timer (or any timer you may have about the house) and a little bit of planning. You work uninterrupted for 25 minutes, then relax uninterrupted for 3-5 minutes. In a nutshell, it’s like high-intensity interval training for time management. Here’s the process:

1. Jot down a to-do list for the day
2. Set the timer to 25 minutes
3. Start the first task, do not stop until the timer dings. Mark an “X” next to that task.
4. Take a 3-5 minute break.
5. Take a 15-30 minute break for every four “X”s
6. Repeat steps 3-4 until the first task is finished
7. Repeat steps 3-6 until all tasks are finished

If the tomato timer is too quirky for you, check out this online variation.

The Getting It Done (GTD) method

Invented by productivity guru David Allen, the GTD method is a simple and effective system based on prioritization. It’s easy to lose track of time when you’re juggling so many projects, which results in anxiety and unfinished work. Start each week by raking through your brain for all the things you need to do, can do and want to do. Break them down by order of importance and even finer by specific actions you can take to complete a task. Remember not everything on the list demands your immediate attention; it is there to help you clarify priorities. Use the five-minute list to clump easier projects and refer back to it when you get a few minutes of spare time here and there.

RescueTime

Available for both PC and Mac users, RescueTime is an online tool that tracks how often you give in to tempting distractions like Facebook while working on the computer. It’s pretty easy to use, too:

1. Categorize the websites you frequent by degree of productivity (scale from -3, least productive to +3, most productive)
2. Use RescueTime Pro to set a browsing time limit for non-work sites
3. RescueTime Pro will block those sites and remind you to focus when time is up

For most, the best time management strategy is perhaps a combination of the three. Take the elements that suit your lifestyle and modify them to your liking. But whichever one you decide on, remember the celebrated Nike slogan: “Just Do It.”

Photo courtesy AndyRobertsPhotos

And that insight can amount to a lot of unique feelings that come with being married to the military. How do milspouses cope with love, loss and leaving?

Ali still wanted to send out a family photo in their yearly Christmas card even though they were spending the holidays apart. We love her creative idea!

“My husband, Trevor, missed his sister’s wedding during his first deployment. I know it’s still hard for him when he thinks about missing it.  It’s hard for his sister, too,“ she said. An issue constantly affecting military spouses and service members alike is learning how to deal with missing big events.

A fine line must be straddled between being open enough so there is no resentment without bringing it up so much no one can move past it. It seems the best course of action is to be open with your feelings without dwelling on a negative event and focus on something positive.

“For the last New Year’s he missed, I still went to a party with friends and had him on FaceTime on my phone all night.  (My phone) was passed around and he got to talk to everyone at the party and we rang in the New Year together the best way we could.”

It’s this kind of dedication to making things work that keeps spirits high, even when someone can’t be there for something big, but you can’t always pull off the best surprises alone. Ali enlisted the help of her husband’s friends to help celebrate their third wedding anniversary.

“A friend of ours, who was also deployed at the time, came up with the idea to throw Trevor a surprise anniversary party and have me on video chat,” she said. “About 10 guys got together and grilled…and had me on video chat.  It was morning here, so I made myself a nice, big breakfast and a mimosa.  Even though we were on opposite sides of the planet, it was a very special anniversary that neither of us will ever forget!”

“We’ve never had a problem making an important event special regardless of circumstances.”

Every Event is a Big Event

It’s not the big stuff that gets Gibbs, it’s the little stuff. And lots of little events can add up. She confides in the community she has around her to cheer her up.

“Any event missed by a deployed service member seems like a big one to me,” says Gibbs. “When my best friend was deployed with her husband, I went along on their son’s preschool field trip to the local food co-op.  I don’t know that any parent would see that as a major event in their child’s life, but when neither mom nor dad can go, it’s a big event.”

Sharing Your Story

Gibbs’ blog has been a great help to getting past these military hurdles.

“Some of the longer, more popular military-related posts were sparked from speaking with our state chaplain,” she said. “He reminded me those struggles are so common and other families could surely benefit from hearing our story and encouraged us to write about it so we did.”

The blog has grown over several years to include several crucial life moments like missed events, getting engaged, deployment, reintegration and most recently, having a baby.

“I guess, at the end of the day, this is our life and I love it.  We have met some wonderful people, learned some very important lessons, and become such a strong couple.  Our ability to effectively and respectfully communicate with each other is second to none,” said Gibbs.

Photos courtesy of Ali Gibbs

And if you’re among the 69 percent of smokers that want to quit completely, e-cigarettes might be for you. But are they really the healthy alternative they claim to be?

E-cigarettes are becoming more popular in helping people quit tobacco, but the FDA and some doctors say “Beware!”

Start of a Trend

E-cigarettes, or electronic cigarettes, first emerged in 2008 and since then more than 6 million units have been sold. U.S. sales are projected to reach 5 million in 2013 alone. The popularity is attributed to the fact that many see e-cigarettes as a safe alternative to smoking, but the Food and Drug Administration and the American Lung Association urge caution because the safety and efficacy of the e-cigarette have not been properly studied.

Initial costs can be a bit pricey. A start-up kit can start at about $65, but after that, the cost drops dramatically compared to a regular smoking habit, which can cost thousands per year.

Smoking and the Military

Despite hitting you in the wallet, smoking hurts the military too.

“The rate of tobacco use in the military has increased since 1998, threatening to reverse the steady decline of the last several decades,” an Institute of Medicine report says. “Furthermore, smoking rates among military personnel returning from Iraq and Afghanistan may be 50 percent higher than rates among nondeployed military personnel.”

About 32 percent of active duty personnel smoked tobacco in 2005, according to the American Lung Association. Many studies found that smoking has detrimental effects on military members:

• Smoking is one of the best predictors of military training failure.
• Smokers are more likely to perform poorly on military fitness evaluations.
• Smokers are more likely to sustain injuries, particularly musculoskeletal injuries.
• Smokers report significantly more stress from military duty than non-smokers, especially those who reported that they use smoking to control stress.

The FDA, ALA and Harvard Medical School say that the e-cigarette might not be a viable alternative to traditional smoking.

An FDA study found that the amount of nicotine inhaled per puff is inconsistent. Also, the FDA found a number of chemicals that could prove to be harmful to humans — diethylene glycol (a toxic substance) and nitrosamines (carcinogens also in tobacco), among four others.

Smoking has no place in a healthy military household, in a financial or physical sense. If you or your spouse smoke, then the wise thing to do for your health and wallet is to quit. Switching to an e-cigarette might serve as a temporary crutch to get you past smoking, but it’s not a healthy alternative. The best thing to do is to cut it out altogether.

Photo courtesy Michael Dorausch

Although the concept of the pin-up predates the 20th century, its prevalence in modern conflicts has faded to the background. Still, there’s a few women keeping the flame alive for pin-ups, and keeping morale up the best way they know how.

World War II plane with a pin-up of Betty Grable as nose art.

“Pin-up art has been a part of military history since World War II,” said Gina Elise, founder of non-profit Pin-Ups for Vets, which raises money for veterans’ healthcare. “Artists painted pin-ups on the nose of the aircraft to boost morale for the air crews. The crews liked to imagine that a beautiful lady was watching over them and protecting them.”

According to Militaryspot.com, movie stars such as Betty Grable and Rita Hayworth were the most common pin-ups depicted during World War II. From the 1930s through 1972, Gil Elvgren was the most famous artist of the kind worldwide.

After the war, pin-up style clothing made its way into mainstream commercialization, and pin-up art and photography moved to celebrities. In 1949, photographer Tom Kelley photographed Marilyn Monroe in pin-up fashion, and in 1953, Playboy highlighted her in this pin-up style.

“When we dress up as pin-ups to visit hospitalized vets, we evoke the history of the pin-up and their long-standing ties to military culture,” said Elise.

As pin-up photography became its own art form in the 1950s and 1960s, the genre became more acceptable in places other than war zones.

Although the concept of the pin-up became muddled in the 70s and 80s, artists such as Dave Stevens kept pin-up history and art alive during that time. And in recent years, the idea of the pin-up has reemerged in art and photography, especially in military communities where it signifies honor and valor.

Modern Relevance

The nostalgia of the style has reached a noticeable popularity with military spouses and girlfriends, and created quite the vintage dress and makeup trend.

Gina Elise donates all of the proceeds from Pinups for Vets to veteran and military causes.

“Although the pin-up aesthetic was linked to military culture in the 1940s, the love of pin-up art by service members has continued throughout the decades,” said Elise. “Today’s recent veterans of Iraq and Afghanistan collect the art in the form of vintage tin signs, and even tattoos.”

And she keeps the history of the pin-up going through her non-profit work as well.

“When we dress up as pin-ups to visit hospitalized vets, we evoke the history of the pin-up and their long-standing ties to military culture,” said Elise. “For the World War II vets, it’s almost like being transported to decades past, to a time to when they were very young and strong. Our visits to veterans’ hospitals awaken past memories of some of their proudest moments. All of the veterans appreciate our visits because they know that pin-ups were a piece of ‘The Greatest Generation,’ a generation of veterans that they look up to. They experience a piece of that history when we enter their room, and hopefully for a brief moment, they forget that they are in a hospital.”

Photos courtesy bulliver, zawezome and Gina Elise

While I use to aim for a smaller waistline, I now shoot for a literal finish line and a well-earned racing t-shirt. Over the years, you learn a specific regimen and goals with every transition: college, marriage, babies, multiple relocations, work, and more. For me, fitness has become more than skin deep.

However, a recent trend has grown with the rise of programs like Crossfit, Insanity and P90X that troubles me. Facebook and Pinterest are littered with images of young men and women with rock hard bodies that are posted for inspirational purposes. Some images are even tagged with a workout that insinuates that it is a means to achieve the body in the picture. I think this is absurd hoax that only feeds self-image issues and discouragement.

Pop culture has ventured away from the ultra skinny icons of the past and focused on the lean muscular physique, all in the name of fitness. But is it really fitness?

Fitness Truths

The truth is that these popular perfect body images don’t tell the whole story. Despite the obvious photo editing ruse, here is the truth behind these photos.

• These men and women spend countless hours doing cardio and strength training; much more than 30 minutes a day and probably more like two hours a day.
• They also eat a very strict diet that few of us have the time or money to mess with; let alone the desire or motivation.
• Even if most of us copied their diet and exercise regimen, our genetics and age still play a major role in how our body responds to training.

In a interview with Redbook, fitness guru Jillian Michaels admitted that her recent entry into motherhood had thrown her for a loop. “You can’t have it all, and

The kind of training regimen and diet these athletes live by isn’t realistic for most people.

you have to make some tough decisions,” she said. Despite her militant approach to personal training, she has accepted the reality that most of us are doing great to get a thirty minute workout in.

What Michaels has gained perspective on is the cost of a perfect body. For most of us, it is far too great of a sacrifice. It’s hard to justify how much that level of training would cost, in money or time.

In reality, if fitness is our true goal many of us may already achieved it, despite what the mirror says. Looking “hot” is not a bad thing, but eventually no amount of training will keep you looking like a twenty-something.

It may seem cliché, but we should look away from the scale and the mirror, and focus instead on goals that are health and performance based.

Fitness Goals

Realistic goals should include things like:

• Complete a Race- The popularity of races that range in distances from 5k’s to marathons means that there is an event to help boost anyone’s level of fitness and endurance.
• Keep up with your kids. – Being so healthy that you can outlast your kids in a game of tag is no small feat and is far more rewarding than washboard abs.
• Lose Body Fat – Most of us can benefit from losing fat and the benefits that come thereafter. It’s not about a number on a scale. Check out this link to a guide for loosing body fat.
• Touch Your Toes and Stand on One Leg – However silly it may sound flexibility and balance are major indicators to overall body health. It is a fitness goal many skip, but is crucial to avoiding injury through the years.
• Discover a New Recreational Activity – Explore your community for new ways to have fun and stay active. From hiking and biking trails to sports leagues, when you can make exercise exciting and fun you are much more likely to make it a habit.

According to a study conducted by the University of Scranton, 45 percent of Americans usually make New Year’s resolutions, and only eight percent of those individuals actually achieve their resolution.

Although this statistic may not seem promising, the fact is that about one out of ten people who set out to loose weight, quit smoking, get organized or save money are successful. A ten percent probability still leaves hope for those with a resolution in mind.

Most resolutions involve breaking habits; which by definition are modes of behavior that have become nearly or completely involuntary. Changing an action that occurs so often you don’t even think about it is no easy task. It’s not even a matter of strength, but instead pure determination.

Prep With An Arsenal Of Apps  

Preparation is the key to success in almost every challenge. If you have a resolution or two in mind, consider arming yourself with information and tools that can help motivate and encourage you through the weeks and months following January 1.

The convenience and technology that mobile device apps offer can go along way in your efforts to achieve your New Year’s resolutions.

One of the best tools you may already have in your arsenal is a smartphone or mobile device. For little to no cost, you can download apps that create charts, reminders and lists that encourage you through what can be behavior changing drudgery.

Here are some of the best-rated apps we found for the most common resolutions.

• Quit Smoking – My Last Cigarette For just 99 cents, you can purchase an app that offers a plethora of charts, statistics and pictures that can give you ample motivation to cut the habit. This app’s best features include personalized, real-time incentives that include nicotine readouts, expected cravings, money-saved estimates and life expectancy stats. Android users can try StopSmoking, which is a free comparable app.

• Lose Weight – Lose It! This free app helps you set daily calorie goals according to your current body stats, your activity level and your desired weight. The app helps you create a calorie budget and log food choices with the help of a food calorie value index, exercise calorie expenditure index and built in calculators. You can also sync your activity with pedometers, wireless scales and other devices. If those features don’t offer enough motivation, you can also post your stats via Facebook or Twitter for an added level of accountability.

• Get Fit – Fitness Buddy If exercise is the other key component to achieve total body fitness (the first being diet), this app may be the two in your one-two punch in the battle of the bulge. Fitness Buddy allows you to journal your personal workout, and it offers over 75 various workout routines,  1700 unique exercise and over 1000 HD demo videos. You can also track your body weight and metrics with a body map to help graph your success.

• Spend Less/ Save More – Easy Envelope Budget Aid Is money management a struggle? If so, this app may be the only thing you can’t afford to pass up. This program helps you track your expenses and manage a budget with ease. Modeled after the tried and true, grandma approved envelope budgeting method (allocating all your funds to designated expenditures or “envelopes”), this app syncs with a web-based program that can also be synced with another user’s smart phone. Multiple plans are available according to your needs, but the base plan is free forever; all other plans come with a monthly fee.

• Time Management/Organization – Cozi Family Organizer This app connects you with web-based calendars (including Outlook), to-do lists, and shopping lists through Cozi.com. Because it is an all-in-one type of calendar, users can merge and organize their families’ hectic schedules.  One of this app’s best features is that it is shared; you only need one account for all the users in your family.

These apps are simply recommendations and may not suit your needs. Do some research before you clutter up your devices with applications that are useless to you. Most importantly, make these tools a part of your plan for resolution success, not your only plan.

Make sure you’re doing everything you can to stay healthy and help your body fight off infections and bacteria. Simple changes to your lifestyle, diet and stress level as well as knowing which immune supplements to avoid will help you make it through the season with fewer trips to see the doctor.

Regularly washing your hands will reduce the number of bacteria and viruses your immune system has to fight.

Lifestyle

Some of the most effective ways to boost your immune system are the most basic. We’ve heard it since we were little kids, but first and foremost remember to wash your hands often, especially before meals. Also remember that your immune system isn’t separate from your body, everything works together so maintaining a healthy lifestyle will naturally boost your immune defenses.

Staying on a regular sleep cycle and integrating as much exercise as possible into your routine are great ways to keep your body healthy and happy so it can fight off even the worst cold this winter.

Making sure you don’t forget to eat your fruits and vegetables gives your body the building blocks it needs to fight an infection.

Diet and Supplements

Maintaining a healthy diet can be difficult around this time of the year when fruits and vegetables aren’t as easy to find and holiday parties are full of unhealthy food in big quantities. Staying properly nourished provides your body with all of the building blocks necessary to stay healthy.

If you’re worried you aren’t getting all of the proper vitamins and nutrients, look into a simple daily multivitamin. The Harvard Medical Journal’s review on immunity suggests daily multivitamins are far better at maintaining a healthy immune system and cautions against products with mega doses of only a few. These products overload your body with more than it can handle at once and then leave you worse off after.

Finding a healthy outlet for your stress is key in maintaining a healthy immune system.

Stress

With no surprise, stress is one of the biggest factors negatively affecting immune strength. Although studying the direct relationship between emotional stress and immunity is difficult, studies have noted that the immune system of stressed patients respond slower to invading viruses.

Avoiding stress completely around the holiday season is especially difficult, but taking moments to relax and destress are incredibly important. Activities like yoga and meditation are excellent ways to relax and check out some of our other articles about avoiding stress. It’ll be a lot easier to take 15 minutes out of your day to remove your stress than it will be to spend a week in bed with the flu.

Images courtesy bottled_void, jturn and PeapodLabs